Santa Tracker: 37.5 percent

Okay, so I only moved the Santa Tracker 5% today, but it was an imporant 5%. I'll say nothing more just in case my 2yo twins read this.

Santa Tracker: 32.5 percent

Yay, Internet!

Santa Tracker: 19.4 percent

The redhead reminded me of some purchases we'd already made. Also, we did some shopping.

Santa Tracker: 5.6 percent

Okay, so Santa Tracker 2012 is not off to a great start. It's been a busy time. We'll make it.

Santa Tracker 2012

Christmas, Christmas time is near
Time for toys and time for cheer
We've been good, but we can't last
Hurry Christmas, hurry fast
Want a plane that loops the loop
Me, I want a hula hoop
We can hardly stand the wait
Please Christmas, don't be late.

Debuting in 2007, reappearing in 2008, continuing in 2009, very nearly getting started in 2010 and almost getting complete in 2011, the Santa Tracker is back for another year!

The Dark Knight Returns deleted scene

Catwoman...

...is stealing jewels from a castle. She is interrupted by Queen Renaldi...

...who pulls off Catwoman's mask and cries "Mia Thermopolis! Princess! What are you doing?"

Just then Penguin attacks...

...threatening Mia with an umbrella sword. His attack is parried by the umbrella of Queen Renaldi, who is actually Mary Poppins.

An umbrella duel ensues but is interrupted when a taxi crashes through the castle wall, driven by Elaine O'Connor-Nardo...

...who knocks off Penguin's top hat to reveal that he's her dispatcher, Louie De Palma.

Suddenly Johnny Dangerously...

...dives through the window, kisses "Elaine" and announces that she's secretly Johnny's girlfriend Lil.

But we know he's really Batman.

Batman's identity is confirmed when Batgirl...

...puts a mask on him, only to have her own mask yanked off by Jorge...

...revealing her to be Lynn, who washed hair in Jorge's beauty shop.

All eyes are now on Jorge.

There's an awkward pause.

"All right," Jorge says as he yanks off his wig. "I'm Kevin Bacon."

Banjo joke on Star Trek: Voyager

I just got a sci-fi banjo joke from 17 years ago and 67,000 light years away.

In the 2001 pilot episode ("Caretaker") for Star Trek: Voyager we learn the show's premise: Voyager is pulled across the galaxy by a mysterious caretaker and must make its way back home.

The caretaker assumes several forms, including that of an elderly banjo player...

...who plays a few licks here and there.

The joke (such as it is) occurs when the crew approaches approaches the banjo man asking as he's sitting on a lawn couch, plucking idly. I think he's playing "Go Home."

If you've got Netflix you can check for yourself around the 35:40 mark in Star Trek: Voyager in Watch Instantly.

Cross-posted at J.R.'s Banjo Hangout blog

Cutie mark couture

I'm a guy who likes his comic book shirts in the logo style, so I much prefer...

...to...

So what's a brony to do when dressing his 16-month-old daughter in My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic clothing?

Most of the MLP:FIM wear out there is in the style of drawings...

...and I'm a logo guy.

Fortunately, Inktastic can help a brony out. I just grabbed some PNG files of cutie marks from Wikia, used them to create custom toddler wear at Inktastic and voila!

I'm just getting the three on the left for now, mostly because I don't think the other three are a very good color match.

I'll keep on the lookout for a site that will let me print custom onesies in the correct colors for Rarity, Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy.

Flatt & Scruggs on Netflix Watch Instantly

I just noticed that The Flatt & Scruggs TV Show is available on Netflix Watch Instantly.

This would have been counted as both banjo and TV for the Banjo versus TV project.

Cross-posted at J.R.'s Banjo Hangout blog

Santa Tracker: 75.4 percent

It might not look like it but we're fine, really. We're not seeing a few people until after Christmas.

Also, we're done with Christmas shopping for our dog.

Don't tell her!

Santa Tracker: 66.2 percent

So how is it that the Santa Tracker moves so fast?

Elves.

Santa Tracker: 52.5 percent

Wauwatosa! That's where that one hard-to-find item was hiding. So we're having them ship it to us from Wisconsin and it should be here in time. Yay!

Santa Tracker: 24.4 percent

Okay, our earlier Santa Tracker wasn't entirely accurate, but it's traditional for the first tracker to show 0%. Here's the real deal: We're at 24.4%, which isn't bad for a week before Christmas.

Santa Tracker 2011

Christmas time is here, by golly
Disapproval would be folly
Deck the halls with hunks of holly
Fill the cup and don't say "when"
Kill the turkeys, ducks and chickens
Mix the punch, drag out the Dickens
Even though the prospect sickens
Brother, here we go again

Just as we did in 2007, 2008 and 2009 (and as we would've done in 2010 if that wasn't such a freaky busy December), we are proud to present the Santa Tracker!

Set your DVR: Orange Blossom Special - The Story of a Bluegrass Anthem

The Banjo versus TV project is over, but I still get automated reminders of TV programs that are of interest to banjo players. Here's one that my DVR will be recording tomorrow.

Orange Blossom Special: The Story of a Bluegrass Anthem

Orange Blossom Special is a provocative and moving salute to one of the most enduring fiddle tunes of all time. This is an exploration of an extraordinary song that helped define Bluegrass before it had a name. Covered by musicians around the world. Orange Blossom Special is a song that challenges the virtuosity of all who play it and provides inspirational room to be different each time it is interpreted. Named after a seasonal train that ran down the East Coast to Florida, Orange Blossom Special was written in 1938 by Ervin T. Rouse and made famous by Chubby Wise and Johnny Cash. The song's evocation of the train's sound and speed has been interpreted in every musical form on festival stages around the world. Featuring the music of Vassar Clements, Johnny Cash, Bela Fleck, Charlie Daniels, The Del McCoury Band, String Cheese Incident and others.

The program airs tomorrow (Friday, Feb 4) on Ovation.

Cross-posted at J.R.'s Banjo Hangout blog

That's it for the Banjo versus TV project!

It's time, my loyal readers (Hi Mom!), to end the Banjo versus TV project and to start a new banjo(ish)-related project in its place.

"Why?" I hear you ask, because you're kind of loud when you cry out in surprise.

Because TWINS! That's why.

I've really enjoyed doing the Banjo versus TV project since I started it in 2008 as a new year's resolution. I have, since then and with only a short break, kept that resolution and have spent as much time on my banjo as I spent watching TV. It's been very, very good for my banjo playing.

But with the twins here, a few things are changing. For one, the redhead and I are determined not to have the TV on all the time as we're raising the twins. If I'm only going to watch a meager amount of TV, what's the point of matching that with a meager amount of banjo time?

Also, too: There's just not going to be a lot of time for blogging.

If I'm going to continue exploring the banjo — and I am — I'll need to try a different approach. An approach which will...

• take into consideration the limited amount of time in a new father's schedule,
• figure out how to integrate amateur banjodom and parenthood,
• be a little more forgiving of delay than a track-my-time-really-carefully and blog-about-it-once-a-week project,
• but still be fun.

So watch this space for my next project: New Daddy Banjo.

Cross-posted at J.R.'s Banjo Hangout blog

Zuni Elf on the Shelf

The redhead and I were discussing how creepy Elf on the Shelf™ is, which led to me suggesting that we just get the Zuni doll from Trilogy of Terror and put an elf hat on it, which led to Photoshop, which led to this.

Halloween 2010: Stork with twins

This year's addition to my gallery of Halloween costumes: Stork with twins.

Note that this is 100% costume. The actual twins will arrive soon, when the actual stork brings them.

I won the #bwayplot contest!

The other day I was watching Jesus Christ Superstar on Ovation TV and I actually paid attention to the annoying lower third ad:

So I fired up my little-used Twitter account and tweeted a few plots. A few days later Ovation announced the winners and, whodathunkit, I won first place!

First prize was a pair of tickets to a Broadway show in the winner's area. I picked Hair, which is coming to Chicago in March.

Here's my winning tweet. Click on it to see what Broadway show I summarized. Float over it for a hint.

I summarized a bunch of others, too, like:

I have to admit that this one was my favorite:

After posting this one...

...I felt that I was being too wordy. So I summarized the same show in four words...

...then another in three..

...until I finally found one I could summarize in two words.

IMO, the best posts from my distinquished competitors were...

...and...